Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Scream to Scream, Scene by Scene: SCENE 14 of Scream 3 (0:51:25-0:55:33)

In this project I attempt to review the entire Scream trilogy scene by scene in chronological order. Heavy spoilers and gore throughout!

SCENE 14 of Scream 3
Length: 4mins 8secs
Primary Characters: Sidney Prescott, Dewey Riley, Gale Weathers, Martha Meeks (Heather Matarazzo), Randy Meeks (Jamie Kennedy), and Detective Wallace.
Pop Culture References:
  • The Godfather Part III and The Return of the Jedi (Used as trilogy examples)
  • Reservoir Dogs (Randy describes a potential crime scene this way)

Are you ready for the worst scene in the entire franchise? Gosh, I HOPE SO!

Oh my gawd. Do you know what's behind that door? WELL DO YOU? It's something far scarier than Ghostface could ever be. And given it's daylight on a heavily populated location, the film's use of the "boo scare" reveal just makes the following character introduction ever worse. Sigh. It gives me great pains to present to you...

"Don't shoot, I'm only 17!"


No, but seriously, Martha is awful, and her clothes are awful, and this scene is awful, and Heather Matarazzo is awful (in this), and Martha is awful, and her clothes are awful, and her clothes are awful, and Martha is awful.

Well, you get the picture. Literally.

Not only did they have to give Heather Matarazzo an entirely terrible character that wears entire terrible clothes and exists for entirely terrible expository reasons, but they make the actress say ludicrous rubbish dialogue like the bonmot underneath the screencap. I just can't with this scene, you guys. Every single time I watch this movie I skip it. Well, that is unless I'm screening it for somebody for the first time and they've never witnessed the shocking sights that it holds in its tight, leopard print grip. *shudder*

Well done anonymous police extras. I feel much safer knowing Heather Matarazzo can't stab me to death now that you're around. :/

"What are you doing here?"
"There's something you guys should see."

No seriously, what is she doing there and how did she get onto the lot? "I'm the real life sister of somebody portrayed in Stab" probably doesn't get a lot of gorky 17-year-olds onto film sets these days. Could she not express post the video rather than jumping out of film set trailers in retina-burning pants? SHOULDN'T SHE BE IN SCHOOL INSTEAD OF GALLIVANTING AROUND LOS ANGELES?!? "We miss you in Woodsboro," she says. Yeah, I'm sure they're really disappointed that a new serial killing Ghostface is on the scene and has decided to take up residence in another town. Really disappointed. That does remind me of one of Scream 4's most potent moments, when a crime scene onlooker goes all The Birds on Neve Campbell's Sidney and blames her for bringing the killings with her. But we're getting ahead of ourselves, aren't? This scene has plenty more awful stuff to go yet.


And yet still one of the worst decisions they could have made. It's just silly, isn't it? I mean, this shit is morbid for Martha to be holding on to that tape just in case another killer comes around, isn't it?

"Toldja I'd make a movie some day! Well, if you're watching this tape it means, as I feared, I did not survive these killings here at Windsor College. And that giving up my virginity to to Karen Colcheck at the video store was probably not a good idea."
"Karen Colcheck?"
"Yes, Karen Colcheck."
"Creepy Karen?"
"Shut up! She was a sweet person. We were working late, putting away some videos in the porno section and, ya know, shit happens."

Oh lord, the video tape back and forth between Dewey and Randy! :/

I'm glad you find your goody future husband's banter so funny, Gale, but while you're here in this scene, I think we can all agree that we'd much rather be watching Gale & Gale Investigations on another channel.

I'm not gonna lie, guys. I'm debating whether to even include Scream 3's "trilogy" rules. I mean, it's just so silly and tacked on. This would have at least made more sense if, as Scream 3 was originally meant to do, it was set in Woodsboro. Alas.

"The reason I am here is to help you so that my death won't be in vein. So that my life's work will help save some other poor soul from being mutilated. If this killer does come back and he's for real, there are a few things you gotta remember. Is this simply another sequel? Well, if it is: same rules apply. Here's the critical thing. If you find yourself dealing with an unexpected back-story, and a preponderance of expedition then the sequel rules do not apply. Because you are not dealing with a sequel. You are dealing with the concluding chapter... of a trilogy!

That's right, it's a rarity in the horror field, but it does exist. It's a force to be reckoned with, because true trilogies are all about going back to the beginning and discovering something that wasn't true from the get go. Godfather, Jedi, all revealed something that wasn't true that we thought was true. So if it is a trilogy you're dealing with here are some super trilogy rules...

"1. You've got a killer who's going to be super human. Stabbing him won't work, shooting him won't work. Basically in the third one you gotta cryogenically freeze his head, decapitate him, or blow him up.
2. Anyone including the main character can die. This means you, Sid. It's the final chapter. It could be fucking Reservoir Dogs by the time this thing's through.
3. The past will come back to bite you in the ass. Whatever you think you know about the past, forget it. The past is not at rest. Any sins you think were committed in the past are about to break out and destroy you.

And he goes on to wish them good luck and, "for some", a see you soon invitation. Of course, nobody from this group actually did die, nor did the finale end up like Reservoir Dogs. If anything, Scream 4 adhered to the rules of Scream 3 much more than Scream 3 did. Funny to note that there was originally a fourth rule, "never be alone." It was taken out because, hilariously, Gale goes off by herself (and the others let her without a fuss, curiously) as soon as Martha leaves.

An amber-hued hair clip. Seriously. AND THOSE PANTS OH MY GAWD! Of course, it just keeps better and better worse and worse.


I repeat.


How long until this late '90s, early '00s fashion trend takes off again?


Sorry for getting so shouty, but it bears shouting. I mean, she shows up out of the blue in Hollywood, shows them a video tape, and then just walks off into the (figurative) sunset. Hell, I'd be thinking she was a suspect. Especially given what her brother's own video said about the past and the beginning and things never being what they seem. Is it too crazy for these guys to assume (or at least Gale since she doesn't personally know Martha) that maybe Randy was a puppeteer from the very start and now he's using his meek sister (lol, MEEK!) to play out some of his dirty work?

You guys, I just came up with the better ending to Scream 3. Sigh.

Even if that wasn't the case, wouldn't they feel a bit strange about sending this 17-year-old off by herself amongst Hollywood as a serial killer is on the loose specifically targeting people with connections (however fictional) to the original Woodsboro?


Thank gawd that's over because one scene later we revisit Gale & Gale Investigations, which is basically what I want my life to be like, okay?

Intro, Scene 1, Scene 2, Scene 3, Scene 4, Scene 5, Scene 6, Scene 7, Scene 8, Scene 9, Scene 10, Scene 11, Scene 12, Scene 13, Scene 14, Scene 15, Scene 16, Scene 17, Scene 18, Scene 19, Scene 20, Scene 21, Scene 22, Scene 23, Scene 24, Scene 25, Scene 26, Scene 27, Scene 28, Scene 29, Scene 30, Scene 31 Scene 32, Scene 33, End Credits

Scream 2
Scene 1, Scene 2, Scene 3, Scene 4, Scene 5, Scene 6, Scene 7, Scene 8, Scene 9, Scene 10, Scene 11, Scene 12, Scene 13, Scene 14. Scene 15, Scene 16, Scene 17, Scene 18, Scene 19, Scene 20, Scene 21, Scene 22, Scene 23, Scene 24, Scene 25, Scene 26, Scene 27, Scene 28, Scene 29, Scene 30, End Credits

Scream 3
Scene 1, Scene 2, Scene 3, Scene 4, Scene 5, Scene 6, Scene 7, Scene 8, Scene 9, Scene 10, Scene 11, Scene 12, Scene 13


pony said...

I want this in book form so badly it hurts.

Weathers said...

It is a pretty bad scene. I thought killing off Randy in "Scream 2" was a bold, effective move. I think the character is great; however, I wish they would have let the character go as this is just pushing it. I am very happy they didn't think of some way to have him featured in "Scream 4."

However, Anthony Anderson's final scene in the fourth film is definitely the franchise's worst.

But this is probably a close second.

will h said...

Yeah, this is where the movie starts falling off a cliff. Sad. Parker Posey is a saving grace.