Saturday, April 25, 2009

Why Can't Matthew McConaughey Stand Up On His Own?

Has anybody else noticed a troubling trend with Matthew McConaughey and his movie posters? Dude can't seem to stand on his own two feed without needing to be propped up somehow.

In these two posters for his romantic comedy Failure to Launch he needs Sarah Jessica Parker to, try as she might, keep him at least partially vertical. In the second international poster he can't even be bothered doing that and must get SJP to wheel him around while he sits in a comfy chair. She's not your slave, Matthew!

A couple of years earlier he was in another rom-com, this time with Kate Hudson. Yet again he needed the women of the movie to keep him standing. Note to Matthew, if you put your weight on your feet then you'll be able to stand all by yourself like a big boy!

And then a few years later he needed Hudson's help yet again, although this time it wasn't all his fault. He was probably going to collapse under all that ridiculous CGI that was slapped on his and Hudson's body.

When it comes to his surfing movie (did this even get released?) Surfer, Dude he has decided to ditch women altogether and props himself up with a big animal-filled tree. Why can't he just stand properly?!

Even earlier on his McConaughey's career he needed assistance to stand up. In this poster for The Newton Boys he is thankfully propped up between three other men. If he weren't maybe he's just collapse right where he stood.

He didn't even get out bed for this one!

And that brings us to the poster for his latest movie, the Jennifer Garner co-starring rom-com Ghosts of Girlfriends Past. Garner must have seen Matthew on other movie posters and figured he'd need a helping hand in staying upright so she uses his scarf as a sort of intricate pulley system.

Matthew, you need help!


Stefany said...

Ha, ha! That's pretty funny...

Speaking of McConaughey, watch the film Frailty (directed by Bill Paxton). It was really good, yet controversial to some.

la scorchita said...

This is brilliant! Why hasn't anyone else noticed this? Perhaps he should look into crutches?