Monday, June 9, 2008

Top Ten Queens

Today, in Australia, is good ol' Queens Birthday Long Weekend. Er, it's just the "Queens Birthday" (her actual birthday is April 21, so I don't know why we celebrate it this weekend), but the only reason people give a damn is because they get a day off. I had to work, but I got paid a shitload of money to do so, so I'm cool with it.

Anyway, as opposed to getting drunk and fondling someones boob, my form of celebration is to create a list! What else?!

10. Lucille La Verne (voice) as "Queen" in Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs - My favourite character from Walt's classic animated tale has always been the evil queen. She may not be the fairest of them all, but she's way more fun than any of those silly dwarfs.

9. Kirsten Dunst as "Marie Antoinette" in Marie Antoinette - Quite frankly, I don't know if I would have wanted to see a "normal" version of the story of France's reluctant indulgent Queen Marie Antoinette. Thank god for Sofia Coppola then. She punked it up and gave us the Paris Hilton of her day. Thankfully Coppola didn't go so overboard with the austerity and actually cast Paris Hilton.

8. AnnaSophia Robb as "Leslie Burke" in Bridge to Terabithia - In the real world she's just a kid with an imagination, in said imagination she is the ruling Queen of Terabithia. Robb is effortlessly likable in the role of Leslie, which just makes the last act of this really quite remarkable "kid's flick" incredibly sad.

7. Jessica Lange as "Tamora, Queen of the Goths" in Titus - Hahahaha, christ this movie is fucked up. Lange is just a part of it.

6. Guy Pearce as "Felicia Jollygoodfellow" in The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert - The list wouldn't be complete without a queen of the gay male variety, could I? And who better than Pearce's star-making turn in the funniest movie of the 1990s?

5. Sissy Spacek as "Carrie White" in Carrie - She's everyone's favourite Prom Queen, doncha know?!

No, not me, silly!

4. Cate Blanchett as "Queen Elizabeth I" in Elizabeth - Despite how silly the sequel was, it couldn't damage the original film that made Cate Blanchett a star. She won a Golden Globe and was beaten for the Oscar by Gwyneth Paltrow (something that angers many, yet not me). She's both powerful and sexy and mysterious. Unlike in the sequel where she was kinda like a bad imitation of Bette Davis in What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?

3. Rachel McAdams as "Regina George" in Mean Girls - She instantly became a classic teen mean girl. Regina George was the "teen queen", everyone else was just a "wannabe". (Mean Girls was based on a book called Teen Queens and Wannabes, hence...)

2. Judi Dench as "Queen Elizabeth I" in Shakespeare in Love - As good as Dench's Mrs Brown was - and she was, very much so - I prefer her Oscar winning supporting turn in Shakespeare in Love. Every line is worthy of a greatest hits collection of one-liners and I like how Cate Blanchett was obviously riffing off of this very performance in Elizabeth: The Golden Age and failing, despite quite playing the same character very well just under a decade earlier (see no. 4).

1. Bette Davis as "Margo Channing" in All About Eve (Ergo, Gina Gershon as "Cristal Connors" in Showgirls) - One of, if not the, greatest performances of all time is the ultimate queen. Bow before her oh lowly subjects.

I'm sure I've missed some fabulous Queens though. What are your favourites?

BTW, here is a picture I found over at StrangeCulture (click to enlarge) showing Emily Blunt (we love her) as "The Young Victoria". Looks beautiful, let's just the hope the film is good.


Dame James Henry said...

This list is totally MAJOR. Any list whose top 3 entries are Regina George, Dame Judi Dench and Bette Davis is the best ever.

Some other favorite Queens:
-Norma Shearer, Queen of MGM
-Dorothy Zbornak on that episode of The Golden Girls where the girls sneak into a high school reunion and Dorothy takes the name tag of the prom queen
-Garbo, Queen Christina
-Katharine Hepburn as Eleanor of Aquitane in The Lion in Winter
-Ronee Blakely in Nashville, the Queen of Nashville (and Country Music)

J.D. said...

And AnnaSophia...!!!!!

Glenn said...

I thought you may have enjoyed that one, JD! :)

James, I haven't seen any of those movies. How bad am I?! I want to see Nashville so much, but I can't find it on DVD!

Although, I didn't remember that episode of The Golden Girl!

Dame James Henry said...

I can't believe they don't have Nashville in Australia. It's such a fantastic film that will get stuck in your head for days afterwards. Ronee Blakely's performance is easily my favorite of the entire 1970's (although Diane Keaton in Annie Hall is pretty close).

That episode of The Golden Girls is also the one where Rose has to have triple bypass surgery after collapsing at the reunion and her daughter is a major bitch to all the girls in the hospital.

JS said...

A discussion on Queens and not one mention of Miranda Richardson who has cornered the movie marquee on Queen roles?

She's been Mab, Queen of the Old Ways. She's been The Queen of Hearts from Alice in Wonderland. She's even done the Evil Queen from Snow White.

But most of all, you left out her Queen "Queenie" Elizabeth from Blackadder II!

Granted, she'll only be a Countess in The Young Victoria.......