Wednesday, May 7, 2008

When Bad Posters Strike: Sex & the City: The Movie [German Version]

I feel that I should preface this entry with a note. I am dying to see Sex & the City: The Movie. I have wanted to see it for ages. Watching all the repeats just gets me more psyched. I loved the show. I loved the four ladies. I love the four ladies solo and together. I don't care if they not-so-secretly hate each other, whether it be behind their backs or to their faces.

Which brings me, funnily enough, to their actual faces...


[click to enlarge... if you dare!]

...those are some majorly photoshopped heads! Do any of those faces belong the bodies below them? Kim Cattrall's head just looks so completely and utterly disembodied that it appears to just be floating a few inches away from her shoulders. Notice, she has no neck. And what is up with that hair? Is that hair tied in a scrunchy at the back, cause it's totally a grade five "I'm gonna grow my hair til it reaches my knees" sorta 'do.

Cynthia Nixon (*sigh* we love Cynthia Nixon, she's our favourite) on the other hand looks like they extended her next by a few inches. It makes her look vaguely alien-ish, no? And, in case they didn't get the memo, Nixon is only gay in her real life. Her character Miranda is straight and married with a child so why is the body beneath that strange head so mannishly posed?

Sarah Jessica Parker is... well... umm... er... HOLYMOTHERFUCKINGHELL!!!WHATISSHEWEARING???! It's like a mother of pearl threw up on her through a stained glass window. Is she wearing a sleeved cape?

A SLEEVED CAPE?!?

And then we get to the lovely Kristen Davis who, let's face it, is the only normal looking one on this god forsaken poster. She looks pretty and that dress is smokin'. However, the one issue I have with her is that she appears to be looking directly into SJP's giant national security level hairdo. How can she see through that thick mop?

And then you have Sarah looking at street level to the right, while Kim Cattrall is looking vaguely forward and up, yet Cynthia Nixon is starring at something else entirely in the right side of a sky. Maybe she saw the mothership arriving in New York City to return Ms Nixon, aka Queen of the Four Planet Alliance, to her rightful home in the universe (Saturn, naturally). Her face is whiter than the others, maybe her intergalactic spaceship is using it's high beams?

via via.

1 comment:

Catherine said...

Hahah, this cracked me up. Samantha's lack of neck alone is hilarious (yes, I do refer to them by their character names). Still, mega looking forward to this. It opens the day I graduate from high school...