Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Glenn Liveblogs the New Janet Jackson Video

Because I think it deserves it!



Janet Jackson is still confused about her race. "Light skin / Dark skin / My asian persuasion!"

Janet has one massive weave.

For some reason she's writhing around on what appears to be a mini planet. Pluto, perhaps?

I have no idea what's going on.

For some reason there are Daft Punk robots in space.

Ooh! Now they're jumping around.

And they're still jumping around.

Hahah, so badass!

SHE HAS GOLD SHOOTING OUT OF HER BODY!!!!omg

The Daft Punk robots are multiplying for some reason!!!

Is that marshmellow they're dancing on? I have a funny story involving marshmellows, come to think of it, but there's no time for that now.

Yay, choreography!

"My swag is serious / I'm heavy like a first day period" is perhaps the single greatest song lyric of all time. If I had a dollar for every time I've said to myself "my swag is heavy like a first day period!" I'd be super rich, y'all!

Things are falling out of the sky for absolutely no reason!!!

The dancing isn't in slow motion, but the weird water splish splash effects are. The continuity in this clip sucks royally.

This all-black (as in the outfits) dance routine isn't exactly "Rhythm Nation", is it? It's still the best thing she's done since "All Nite (Don't Stop)". Not that that is particularly hard to accomplish, mind you.

Oh! Why are they all being flushed away?

And now she's playing with glowing orbs. Neato!

Janet's so hip-hop.

Wow, that ending is so bizarre. It's like something David Lynch would come up... if he had an obsession with milk and shiny glowing orbs. Which, let's face it, I wouldn't put passed him.

Conclusion: That was strange.

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